Strengths:
- follows a Gothic style
- creates interesting, real-life characters and relationships
- grabs the attention of the reader
- nice sentence structure and vivid diction
- very creative
Weaknesses:
- incorrect word use (ex. "begun" instead of "began")
- some problems with subject-verb agreement
- changes frequently between tenses and voice
- dialogue is not written correctly
There is also some confusion throughout the paper. If it is structured well, it could be used as a device to dd to Gothic style. However, I think the confusion might be due to beginning writing. A little work could clear it up and make it stronger.
I really enjoyed reading, and would love to read the next draft!
2 comments:
Hey Katie!
Your response to the reading was really similar to mine but there were a few differences that I thought I could comment on just a bit. Although I agree that the story was good, it was not necessarily well-written. As I was reading, I had a tendency to think that "Jeremy" did not pre-write his story at all. I could definitely tell that he put some thought into the content but he could have developed it much more, especially in the ending.
As for your list about the strengths and weaknesses of the story, it almost exactly matches my list. Imaginative, follows the style, subject/verb tenses, flow, grammar, word choices... I agree with you on all of them. Great response, glad I got to read it.
I like how you've broken down the strengths and weaknesses of the text in an itemized fashion. This helps with preparing for writing conferences: helps you as the teacher, and it helps the student to clearly see his or her strengths and weaknesses as they look towards revision.
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